A not so sparkling report

One of our sources today emailed Norman Baker Watch a copy of the latest leaflet from Norman Baker and his Fib Dem pals.

The Lib Dems' South Downs Observer amusingly boasts about how it has been delivered to you for free as if anyone would pay for this dismal collection of party propaganda. But Norman Baker Watch was more interested by the story boasting about how great the Audit Commission thinks the Lib Dems are at running Lewes District Council.

According to the article the commission reckons the Lib Dem council got a "sparkling report". But unsurprisingly the Lib Dems decided to turn a blind eye to some parts of the report including criticisms about:

• The lack of a child protection strategy
• The council's lack of any idea of how to deliver its aims
• The failure to address the high turnover of staff at the council
• The council's failure to consult users of its services on how to improve services
• And, the failure to improve recycling to meet national targets
  

In short Norman Baker and his pals are failing children, taxpayers, council staff, users of council services and the environment.

Just about everyone then (apart from child abusers).

BNP back Baker

Norman Baker Watch last week reported on the selective quoting of Times columnist Matthew Parris on Norman Baker's web site.

But today Norman Baker Watch found a 100% genuine quote endorsing Norman.

It reads: "Refreshingly Mr Baker is one of the few MPs who recognises that the vast sums claimed by MPs in expenses and allowances is taxpayers’ money, and that taxpayers have every right to know what it is being claimed for."

The source of the quote goes on to call Norman "public spirited".

Even though Baker regularly uses quotes from others to promote himself, Norman Baker Watch understands why this quote won't find its way onto his web site since the source of this glowing praise is an article by the despicable British National Party.

Hail to Xenu

Norman Baker Watch today came across an Evening Standard article from January where Norman Baker rallies against Labour and the Tories for allowing a charity linked to the cult of Scientology to buy exhibition space at their annual conferences.

"Scientology is a dubious cult at best and it's worrying that it seems to have inflitrated both Labour and the Tories," says Baker.

But strangely Baker forgot to mention that his party has led the way on Scientology in politics.

Way back in 1996, the Lib Dems gave Britain its first Scientologist politician in the form of Lord McNair, who told Parliament: "My Lords, in asking this question I have to tell the House that I have an interest in it. I am a member of the Church of Scientology."

You can find out more about the work of the Lib Dem Scientologist peer here.

Surely the state of Baker's own party should be warning enough of the dangers of Scientology to both the Labour and Conservative parties.

Crikey!

Seems Norman Baker Watch's hopes for a joint investigation by Norman Baker and David Icke may be more realistic than originally thought.

As the Liberal England blog reminds us, David Icke was at one time being lined up as a Liberal candidate.

Lucky to have him?

Norman Baker fans will doubtless be aware of how he uses a 10-year-old quote from Times columnist Matthew Parris on the frontpage of his website, which says: "You underestimate him at your peril... He has a habit of being right. He sticks to his guns and I think his constituents are very lucky to have him."

But shame Baker left out the comments Parris made just before that quote. Thankfully the BBC didn't forget to include them: "He bores for Britain. He is a super-bore. You sit up in the middle of what he is talking about, stunned and amazed that anybody could be so boring."

Given the comments in that BBC report, Norman Baker Watch can't help but laugh at the irony of some of this blog's contributors calling this blog boring.

But does Parris's claim that Baker's "constituents are very lucky to have him" still stand up a decade on? What with his failure to get Lewes the flood defences it needs and his attempts to stop Brighton and Hove Albion from having a football ground (and those two are just for starters), Norman Baker Watch thinks not.

The David Icke Connection

Norman Baker's got a new supporter thanks to his "exposé-that-never-was" into the death of Dr David Kelly. It's none other than sports journalist turned son of God turned conspiracy theorist – David Icke.

Icke's latest email newsletter notes Baker's work on the theory that Dr Kelly was murdered and tells how Dr Kelly "was killed because his knowledge was a threat to the official lies about the dangers posed by Saddam Hussein".

Let's hope Icke's new respect for the MP for Lewes leads to greater things.

Norman Baker Watch is waiting with bated breath for a joint Icke-Baker exposé of how the royal family are, in fact, reptiles.

Question Time

As his fellow MPs know all too well, Norman Baker always has a question to ask.

Just take written parliamentary questions to government ministers. Since the start of this year (i.e. January and February) he has asked 100 questions.

And at only £134 a question why not? It’s £13,400 of public money well spent, especially with probing questions like these:

“For what reasons the chairs in Refreshment Department catering outlets in Portcullis House were recently replaced?” Answer: Because they kept breaking

“How much was spent by the House authorities on (a) additional cutlery and (b) replacing missing cutlery in 2006?” Answer: We don’t monitor the whereabouts of individual spoons

“To ask the Secretary of State for Transport if he will make a statement on the incident which caused the closure of part of the M1 on Christmas Day?” Answer: A road accident

What interesting questions will Baker ever come up with next?

Baker Storms Transition Town Lewes

Being one never to miss an opportunity to hijack a community event for his own ends Norman Baker’s been cosying up to the Transition Towns Lewes group in recent weeks.

Ahead of its official launch the environmental group held a brainstorming event encouraging people to write down ideas for action on lots of post-it notes so they could take to make Lewes a greener town (using less post-its could be a start).

But one idea in particular caught Norman Baker Watch’s eye. It read: “Keep in with Norman Baker our local and highly approachable MP”.

Wonder who came up with that suggestion?

Baker Gets Conspiratorial

Norman Baker’s getting all paranoid again. His epic inquiry into the death of Dr David Kelly, shown on BBC2’s Conspiracy Files show, proved highly underwhelming.

Baker reckons Dr Kelly was murdered because his method of suicide was unusual, but still seems to lack any idea of who did it and why.

Let’s hope he finds that conclusive evidence he is hunting for. After all he did say he quit the Lib Dem frontbench to do this inquiry (he was not pushed in any way whatsoever of course).

But even if it all goes nowhere, there’s always the children’s book Baker said he planned to write after his exit from the Lib Dem frontbench. Given his wild imagination it’ll no doubt an entertaining if unbelievable story.

Baker Goes Nuclear

There might be growing international pressure on Iran to stop its nuclear plans, but I doubt Norman Baker will be worried.

Back in 23 January 2006, Baker was busy telling the Islamic Republic News Agency (the mouthpiece of the Iranian government) that until the UK ditched its own nuclear power stations and weapons we can’t challenge Iran on its nuclear ambitions.

He told the hacks at the Islamic Republic News Agency that it was “odd that we encourage countries to go down one road, but perhaps go down a different road ourselves”.

Or perhaps it’s not odd at all - given that Iran is a religious dictatorship ruled by a crazed Holocaust denier who has called for Israel to be wiped off the map - that the UK and the rest of the international community don’t want them having nuclear power.

What's happened to Baker's air miles?

It's been hard to avoid Norman Baker in the past few days thanks to him getting a breakdown of MPs travel expenses published.

He has been racking up column inches with this, even getting the blue rinse bible that is the Daily Mail to praise him. But his victory isn't quite what it seems.

First off the data Baker got hold of doesn't take account of where MPs live and how good local transport links are. It also doesn't include travel that MPs didn't claim expenses on - like his own freebie trip to Australia last year.

But what's this I see in today's Sunday Mirror? Baker says: "If MPs accure air miles they should be given back to the public purse or to a charity."

I wonder if he handed in the air miles from his freebie flight to the land of Oz?

Tough on flowers, tough on the causes of flowers

Valentine's Day became the latest target of Norman Baker's ongoing quest for newspaper headlines this week. He says buying imported roses is causing global warming and we should all be buying British roses.

Apart from the surprise that Baker should be enraged by Valentine's Day, his call for action is nonsense.

Figures from the Policy Exchange think tank show that while importing 10,000 Indian or Keynan roses uses one barrel of oil, the energy used growing the same amount of roses in heated greenhouses in the UK is equivalent to four barrels of oil. So Baker's plan would actually cause more global warming than his alleged solution.

And that's before anyone even mentions the poverty his barmy plan would inflict on the workers in developing countries who would lose their jobs if Baker got his way.

Another ill-thought out policy from Baker then.

Norman Baker's car tax plan

Norman Baker and his Lib Dem friends on Lewes District Council are planning to expand Lewes' much-hated parking scheme.

The Lib Dems forced the parking scheme on residents a few years' back to popular hatred. They now want to take it a step further and make it a green parking scheme by charging people more for having cars that produce more carbon emissions per kilometre. But this scheme is only green as in envy rather than environmental.

Aside from stinging 69% of residents with an extra charge (nice revenue raiser for the council), the scheme won't charge people based on the pollution they cause only the efficiency of their car engine. So Toyota Prius owners who drive everywhere can rack up as much pollution as they like (and get a discount on parking to boot) while owners of Renault Clios and other cars can fork out more even if they drive rarely.

Just check out the flaws with the Richmond scheme that Lewes Lib Dems plan to copy.